Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Good Sex Guide Mk II (But Strictly no Sex)

While tripping innocently through the blogosphere earlier today, I found the most hysterical post over at The Pen and Ink. Now, I have to say I'm not sure whether it's based on reality or a spoof (rather like the Good Sex Guide I laughed about a few months ago!!) but either way it's good for a laugh. Though actually if it's true, it's not so much funny as bloody chilling.

The following guidelines apparently come from a 1954 article on how to write stories for boys and girls. You may need a stiff drink to calm your nerves!
"Dad should always work in an office or to a responsible job like a fireman or a policeman. Fathers should never be an unemployed loafer or a union organizer. Mothers should always be homemakers. Mother’s who work in offices set a bad example for impressionable girls."

Yeah, OK...

"Boy characters should have healthy, manly hobbies like playing baseball, collecting bubble gum cards, and outdoor camping. Girls should like sewing, cooking and talking with other girls about like clothes and boys. Activities that keep boys inside like reading, writing or thinking are not suitable role models for young men. Those are girl activities. On the other hand, too much physical exercise by girl characters would be unrealistic and your reader would lose interest. If your story has a Tomboy, make sure she is not a major character. Make the Tomboy a supporting character who longs to act like a real girl."

I don't even know where to begin with this one. Leaving aside the whole sewing aspect for girls, is the author of this piece seriously saying boys should not read, write or think?! And then goes on to say they're girl activities. Hmm so girls can think and boys can't, but when it comes down to it men rule the world and the women have to stay at home... oh yeah! Makes total sense now!!

And as for the tomboy character. OMG!
"Dress your characters in appropriate clothing. Boys: short sleeve shirts (only puny boys who spend too much time reading in their rooms wear long sleeve shirts), loose, comfortable pants with pockets and Keds sneakers with tied laces.

"Girls: ankle-length skirts (absolute no pants), Mary Jane shoes (only girls with loose morals wear high heels unless attending special occasions like a funeral or a wedding), hair tied in a pony tail or neatly trimmed.
"If you follow these tips, your story is sure to be a delight to boys and girls everywhere, and stand the test of time just like the classics you read as a youth.

"End your story with a good, hearty laugh at the dinner table. Perhaps, Skippy the family dog runs through the house chasing Fluffy, the neighbor’s cat.

"These are a few tips for a good writing and wholesome reading."

OK so what's the verdict? Could this have been pulled from a genuine article written in 1954 or is it a send up?


Mel Teshco said...

I really can't decide if that's the real deal or if it's really a send up. I often wonder what people from a hundred years ago would think of what's going on today.

Emma Lai said...

I vote real deal given the magazines from the time periods. Crazy how things have changed.

Cathryn Hein said...

I wouldn't know if it's genuine or not, but I can say it's a crackup!

Cari Quinn said...

I collect bubble gum cards and I sew...whoa, I'm a renegade! (No, not really on any of the above, LOL)

Love it, Christina!

Helen Hardt said...


Amanda Ashby said...

Not sure if this makes it better or worse but I mis-read and thought that dad couldn't be a unicorn!!!!

Christina Phillips said...

OMG! That's so funny. I'm sure this person would have something to say about it if the kid's father was a unicorn!!!

Unknown said...

unicorn, lol.
me, hmm, not sure but i think i failed. hubby got me my first sewing machiine for xmas and i havent a clue how to sew. now thats funny.

Christina Phillips said...

Hi Kez!

It's a major achievement for me if I manage to sew on a button. I even get the iron-on labels for the kids' school uniforms! (tho even then, I have been known to use a permanent marker pen instead!!)